Sorry About Your $25 Overnight Parking Tickets. Too Bad About That Tree, Isn't It?! Be Glad The Price Hasn't Increased To $35 Yet!

 

Depending on what street your car commits the heinous crime of being in the way of the DPW street sweeper early in the morning, HPD will issue you and your car one of two overnight parking tickets.  On State, Warren, Allen, and many north-south streets where there are no posted overnight parking rules, HPD officers issue $15 WRONG SIDE PARKING tickets.  (No signs = $15.)  However, on streets such as Prospect (see pictures), Washington, Union, and others with posted special overnight parking rules that typically don't apply every night of the week (referred to as, I believe, local street rules), HPD officers issue $25 NO PARKING ZONE tickets.  (Yes signs = $25.)  Even though your car is parked on the "wrong side," you will not be issued a $15 WRONG SIDE PARKING ticket where local street rules apply.  You've committed the same crime of parking on the wrong side of the street, but a different ticket with a higher fee applies.  And to add the confusion, if HPD finds that someone has parked their car during the day or night alongside a yellow curb and/or in front of a NO PARKING ANY TIME sign, they issue the same $25 NO PARKING ZONE ticket.  Different crime, but same ticket and same fee.  This makes all the sense in the world, doesn't it? 

Who Will Save Us? Or Is It Too Late (After 4 PM)?

At 10 am this morning, no one was available at the so-called Parking Bureau, and the same unhelpful "we are temporarily closed" sign that was on the window last Friday was still there. (Shouldn't the sign be on the front doors of the building or at the entrance to the parking lot or, better yet, at the corner of 7th & Union?!!!!)  There is still no indication on the sign when or if a human being will return to occupy the office behind the window "M-F 9AM-5PM."  The closure is temporarily ambiguously indefinite.  It's just temporary, mind you!  

Can you imagine?

Sure you can!

What's The Opposite Of A Sinkhole? A Volcano?

I first noticed the strange wet problem on Spring Street on July 31st, nearly two months ago, if only because someone had marked it with spray paint.  That paint is long gone, but the problem has been ignored (likely by DPW) and it has only worsened.  A lot.  The asphalt in front of 6 Spring looks ready to erupt at any moment.  The well-cracked large hump, which slowly releases water constantly, is now two or three inches high at its apex.  (Pictures can't convey the severity of the hump very well.)

Sure, Doubling The Ticket Fee To $20 Sounds Appropriate! We Need The Extra Money To Fix The Kiosks!

During Thursday's Legal Committee meeting, chair Margaret Morris, with the help of council attorney Ken Dow, made it clear that she really wanted to get in order and on paper her proposal to raise the price of every parking ticket so that the council can vote on the proposal tonight and get the new ticket fees codified. There's a whole lot to say about the proposed increased initial fees and late fees (the latter is beyond absurd!), but I will just stick with one aspect of the fee overhaul and juxtapose it with reality on the ground.

Pictorial Evidence Of mayor Ferris' "Safer" Intersection, Still The City's Most Dangerous Place To Walk!

The car above had just turned off of Park Place. Yes, it was stopped, though the two elderly pedestrians, while standing in the crosswalk, essentially got permission from the driver to resume their crossing of the street.  Pedestrians attempting to communicate via eye contact with people behind the wheel and glass of a multi-ton vehicle, particularly those that are moving, is usually a challenge, never fun, not always successful, and often doesn't end well.  Vehicles tend to have the upper hand in this ugly relationship that is regularly forced on pedestrians.  My motto is, "You can't reason with a vehicle; you can only curse it.  Don't assume it's going to stop."

Welcome To The New & Improved Parking Bureau At HPD! Go The Hell Away! We Don't Want To Help You Pay For Your Parking Ticket!! Now Scram!

On Wednesday at 9:10 am, inside the HPD station at 701 Union, I came across three people (two seated, one standing) waiting for someone behind the Parking Bureau window to lift the blind so that they could pay their parking tickets.  None of them looked thrilled to be waiting and wondering.  One woman was filling out an envelope to be put in the slot, having given up on the idea of handing her money to a human being.  She didn't have a hard surface or clipboard to write on. 45 minutes later, the blind was up and the clerk was ready to accept money, questions, and complaints.

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